Sacred Parenting

Ken and I  are just starting to read a book together called Sacred Parenting.  The author, Gary Thomas, is most well known for his book, Sacred Marriage, in which he suggests that the object of marriage is not so much to make us happy, but rather to make us holy.  In this book, Sacred Parenting, he takes a look at how God uses our children to change us to be more like Him.

We received the book in the mail this week and as I was opening the package, Hannah was watching and eagerly waiting to see what was inside.  Quickly glancing at the book, and obviously misreading it, she asked, "Mom, what is Scared Parenting?"  I had to laugh out loud.  As I explained that it was Sacred Parenting and what that meant, I couldn't help but think that her statement was actually more profound than she knew.  

I think many of us daily struggle with "scared parenting". It is the tendency to parent reactively rather than proactively.  As we rightly realize the importance of the task before us, we become anxious.  Then, out of a true desire for what is best for our children, we parent as if the outcome is completely up to us.  

As I have struggled through this wrong thinking, I have found peace in following a God who loves my children far more than I do.  Yes, it is a sacred calling to raise our children in the fear and admonition of the Lord.  However, it is He who holds their hearts and turns them as He pleases.  With each of our children, we have taken them before the Lord as children of His covenant.  We commit to pray for them, teach them, love them with His love, and, as Hannah did with Samuel, in our hearts, leave them before the Lord.  I so wish I could do that perfectly, but I find myself daily wanting to again take control, assuming that I somehow know better than the Lord.  If only, I think, I could impress this or that truth upon their little hearts then they would be okay.  But, thankfully, that isn't the case.  No, I will continually give them to the Lord, trusting Him with their hearts, confessing my own sin and lack of faith.  Knowing that through them, God is working for my holiness and for theirs, but ultimately for His glory. What sweet freedom there is in His truth!

And though I hold this truth tonight, I know that tomorrow I will again struggle with "scared parenting" and again I will have to look to the cross and know that the One who created my children has a plan for them.  And that He also created me to be their mother and He has a plan for me as well.  I just have to trust Him in this, that is truly a sacred journey.